An Indelicate Dilemma

The temperature in Seattle has finally risen above seventy and some female flesh has emerged from the Seattle Burka(goretex and polarguard swaddling)
You've got a seat on the bus, basking in the sun and the view.(life is good)
Mr Happy agrees(emphatically)
A hot Mom gets on the bus( and clearly really needs your seat)
But if you stand up your awkward boner ends up right in her face.

Act nonchalant and hope she does the same?
Act nonchalant and wink?
Whistle loudly and tunelessly while turning in circles so other riders can share the discomfort?

Wherefore art thou JRR Tolkein

Alas, poor Yorick! I knew him, biblically , a fellow of infinite
lust, of most excellent fancy. He hath bore me on his back a
thousand times, and now how in my imagination it is!
My prong rises at it.

Today's trivia- Horny(to be inflamed with lust) is an very old term. Well before Shakespeare's
era " to have the horn"(an erection) was a popular euphemism. You can thank some stuffy old
Cambridge language professor for this kernel of wisdom.

Two Girls One Whirled Cup

Masturbation causes blindness- like many old wives tales, this has a grain of truth.
Occasionally teen boys look down when they spew and glue their eyes shut.

Breaking news- a film critic, well known for his harsh reviews has been murdered by one of Hollywood's most famous actors.

Now he's the "The Star Strangled Panner"

Pubic Service Announcement

Cunninlingusaurus Cephaloafferus

This dinosaur whose tongue was as long as his name fed exclusively on nectar.

Todays' true facts
- the name for hummingbird in Brasil is Beija Flor (flower kisser)
- chicken sexer is a legitimate job title (rooster?)

Lucky for me they don't make a METH-a-lyzer

Start over... it clearly states circle one answer... not three

Most Terrifying Remake

ALEX (Played by Miley)
One thing I could never stand is to see a filthy, dirty old drunkie, howling away at the filthy songs of his fathers and going blerp, blerp in between as it might be a filthy old orchestra in his stinking rotten guts. I could never stand to see anyone like that, whatever his age might be, but more especially when he was my Dad.

The girls stop and applaud him.

TRAMP(Billy Ray Cyrus)
Can you... can you spare some nookie?

DROOG DIM(Amy Winehouse)
Yeah

TRAMP
Anybody else?

DROOG GEORGIE(Britney Spears)
That's a right purty mouth... cue Dueling Banjos by the Berlin Philharmonic

DROOG PETE (Paris Hilton)
Squeal, WHEE WHEE rips off his tighty whities and rams her strapon into the Tramp. The girls laugh.

Miley, Britney, Paris, and Amy have formed a cover group that only performs when they are PMSing.

Bloatie and the Ho-fish